jqL-The Rock Side of Me

The dumbest thing ever
is to let someone read your palm

Back in Grade 7,
I let my friend read my palm
She said
"You are going to have 3 relationships in your life"

I used up two . . .

July 2008 - I went to Toronto
We were all drunk
I went for palm reader

She said
"You are going to meet your soulmate soon enough on (bla bla bla) dates"

The thing is . . .
The rock side of me
"If you are going through hell, keep walking" - Winston Churchill

I have been fighting against fate for the longest time ever

Struggle struggle struggle

God please forgive me,
as I have done sins
amen
for once and for all,
for once I start
I probably won't know how to stop

The Talk of Immortality

I see many total strangers pass by everyday
They are all busy with their daily life
There is no bond between me and these people
I think this goes the same for them as well

Funny,
I start to ask myself a question
What is this all about?

Why should we come to this world,
if we have to leave one day,
Without knowing where we head,
or what we are becoming?

Shit,
There is no perfectly fine answer to this question
even though human has existed for some time now

Sometimes, I asked myself this question

What about You grant me some immortality?
Since thinking about death is troublesome

Well,
My Friend who arts in heaven never answer
(I guess my Friend is busy)
so I guess I need to answer my own question
again......................................

I guess living forever is uncool either,
If I want to stay forever,
I would have to force myself
to see my beloved ones leaving me one by one
I don't know where they go,
Then I might even be lonelier than now
Which is troublesome
I will be drinking with a perfect strangers soon enough
The thing is, if I never leave
I might never know where they went as well
soon as they left

What if You give everyone immortality?

Isn't it too obvious?
Well, the world is too crowded already I guess

Then I guess,
I answered my question
for once again
I should leave when I should
But now, please lemme have fun first
in this mortal world

What to do...

Crossroads...
Cant screw around anymore
I have to make a decision
School or Money
Many might not understand
that I do not have what they have

Feeling of guilt studying while parents are suffering,
the feeling of being useless to the family

I miss the coffee talks
I miss the perverted jokes
I miss the random laughs
I miss the drinking nights (and days & mornings)
I miss it all
I miss it all and I miss it all
I miss it all and all and all of em,
I cherish every one of em,
but it seems like I can never go back to them
It has to be my time to step up somehow and get my life straightened out

Oh trust me.. it aint that easy being a guy...
at least back then when we were together we didnt care about a thing in the world...

ireove2

So many sweet things had gone by
So many sweet things had fallen apart

that's why...

those sweet things need to visit me
those sweet things need to be built up
for once again

I haven't forgotten about you
about the sweet things we had
about the sour things we had
there ain't no more truth
there ain't no more lie

they once said,
every opening should have an ending
every heart will eventually stop beating

that's why,
I would like to apologize for the last time
before I leave the scene

I'm sorry for how childish I was
I'm sorry for the way I treated you
I'm sorry for the broken promises
I'm sorry for the fact that red and blue are the eternal enemies

We can't be together
We can't be bonded

Therefore, goodbye...
let us forget the name "a . . . . . . . e"
let those characters fade

now I finally can close this story with an ending
now I finally can forget about those memories
for once and for all
if you ever have a chance to find out this site
I would like you to do the same thing
thanks

Dream

well, since jql posted sth about the dream, i might as well shared a fked up one that i had the other day
i was writing my paper upon Alexander the Great and Genghis Khan for the past week
before the night that I hand the paper in i had this wierdest dream ever

1> i was somewhere that covered with snow and rocks
2> there are some random wierd people around me aka yp, od

and all of a sudden, there's one guy riding a huge horse charging at me and shout "DIE MOTHER F***ER!" followed by a bunch of wierd dudes

the thing that is freaking me out was that od was riding the horse with the leader and actually seemingly enjoying the atomsphere of hugging that leader... which i thought was Alexander

then from the disgusted feeling, i woke up around 3 am
when i go bak to sleep, i had another nightmare
this time, its yp + od + a mongolian dude....
and actually, they are all naked.... pluging in and out....

the nastiest nightmare that i ever had... its a total nightmare....